Whatever you do don't Google thong face mask.

I saw a masks bikini yesterday! (online)

Growing Coastal wrote: ↑Thu May 28, 2020 9:35 am I saw a masks bikini yesterday! (online)

No kidding...I saw a mask made from a bra cup.

These are the rules, no lips or nostrils can be exposed.
((((Cheeks and Chins))))) are okay.

Thought this might bring a chuckle or two...

SpookyShoe wrote: ↑Thu May 28, 2020 5:02 pm

Growing Coastal wrote: ↑Thu May 28, 2020 9:35 am I saw a masks bikini yesterday! (online)

No kidding...I saw a mask made from a bra cup.

Me too and I've seen home made masks that look like bra cups. Looked funny, to me, on a man's face. Some enterprising seamstresses are making them up and selling them for $10.00 each.

When you fall asleep during yoga class...

Re-opening

A little girl asked her Mother: 'How did the human race appear?' The Mother answered, 'God made Adam and Eve; they had children; and so was all mankind made.' Two days later the girl asked her Father the same question. The Father answered, 'Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved.' The confused girl returned to her Mother and said, 'Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from monkeys?' The Mother answered, 'Well, Dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family, and your Father told you about his.'

One day I met a sweet gentleman and fell in love. When it became apparent that we would marry, I made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans.
Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on the way home from work. Since I lived in the countryside I called my husband and told him that I would be late because I had to walk home.
On my way, I passed by a small diner and the odor of baked beans was more than I could stand. With miles to walk, I figured that I would walk off any ill effects by the time I reached home, so I stopped at the diner and before I knew it, I had consumed three large orders of baked beans. All the way home, I made sure that I released all the gas.
Upon my arrival, my husband seemed excited to see me and exclaimed delightedly: 'Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight.' He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took a seat and just as he was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone rang.
He made me promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned and went to answer the call. The baked beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure was becoming most unbearable, so while my husband was out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill. I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me vigorously. Then, shifting to the other cheek, I ripped off three more. The stink was worse than cooked cabbage. Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room, I went on like this for another few minutes. The pleasure was indescribable. When eventually the telephone
farewells signaled the end of my freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with myself.
My face must have been the picture of innocence when my husband returned, apologizing for taking so long. He asked me if I had peeked through the blindfold, and I assured him I had not. At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated around the table chorused:
'Happy Birthday!'
I fainted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I always love the cat jokes the most.

A funny news item that happened locally.

Waukesha Blotter: 1:44 pm Sun — Caller reported finding something suspicious in the area of Fox River Parkway that they wanted to show police — a 5-foot by 3-foot hole with bucket and shovel next to it. Police dug up the suspicious mound which turned out to be a potato garden.